Ah, the St. Patrick's Day season is upon us. Be careful out there.

My friend Bergen spilled a fresh pint of Guinness onto the white sweater of a girl we'd just met. This happened in Washington, D.C. at a fake Irish pub and the full story -- the story of Americans pretending to be authentically Irish and getting a wee bit out of hand during the St. Patrick's Day season -- can be read here.

Which reminds me of the time St. Patrick visited an Irish pub.

Donovan, McNally and Finnegan see St. Patrick and each buy him a beer. Before leaving, St. Patrick shakes Donovan's hand. Donovan says, "My arthritis! St. Patrick, your touch has cured it!" 

St. Patrick next shakes McNally's hand, and McNally says, "My blind right eye! St. Patrick, you've cured it!"

St. Patrick goes to shake Finnegan's hand, but Finnegan jumps up from his chair and runs away from him.

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